MM Needs That Memory Wipe Potion For David

Once Upon A Time, S01E16

Last Sunday, we returned to the story about Snow and Charming after Snow had taken the potion to make her forget her love.   I had forgotten for a moment about that story since we had taken a little detour with the other stories, but I see how they tie in a little to that story seeing as Grumpy and Red are friends of Snow that help her, but we didn't know much about them before.  While the love story between Charming and Snow is gaining momentum, it's a different story in Storybrooke where I'm wondering what it's going to take for MM to send David to the curb for real.  If I thought I didn't like David before, I had no idea how much I'd wish that it had been his heart in that box and not Kathyrn's (as much as I didn't care for her).

I'll start off with the story in the other world.  It was great to see Snow almost act like a stereotypical Disney-esq princess, complete with blue bird to sing with, until she started attacking it with a broom.  That was really unexpected.  I like her transformation from a sweet girl into an angry back-talking bitch.  Better than her attacking the bird was when she attacked all her dwarf friends during Jiminy Cricket's intervention.  I forget which of them complained that she broke his mug, but her response to that ("you're lucky it's not that mug you call a face"--damn) was so funny!  The only thing that lame intervention achieved besides laughter from me was Snow's determination to get deadly revenge against the Queen.

Overlooking that the Queen deserves to be killed, I like a version of Snow White where Snow is not just hiding all the time while taking care of little men in a house.  Why not have her take the preemptive strike and take care of the Queen herself before that witch tries to poison her with an apple??  I mean, the Queen did kill her father and drive her out of her home.  I say go get that bitch!  

However, Grumpy (who might need to be renamed "All Up In Others' Business") stops her reign of terror against unsuspecting knights in the woods and takes her to Rumpelstiltskin.  Oh, yeah, Ol' Rumple will be sure to cure her.  Not only can he not do anything to change her back to her old self, the goblin gives her a bow and arrow and a map so that she can murder the Queen while she's traveling.  Sweet.  He doesn't ask for anything because he is "invested in her future."  Um, I wonder if Snow would be more curious to know the details of that if she wasn't so blinded by her revenge.

It gets even better when Rumple has another guest later.  Charming nearly takes off his head to get information about Snow's wheareabouts.  Rumple gives him the information upon the condition that he give him his cloak.  Before he had taken a string of Snow's hair, so it was safe to assume that he wanted Charming's hair too.  Why, this wasn't clear until later he put the two hairs together and seemed to have created the potion for true love.  Huh.  What the hell is going to do with that?  He surely isn't going to use it on himself since he already booted his love out of his life and out of hers ultimately.  The thing that was really good about Charming showing up wasn't the mystery of Rumple collecting hairs, it was the sort of scolding he gave Charming for hurting Snow in the first place and forcing her to drink the potion.  As underhanded as the little man is (he's pretty short), he's damn right.  You can't blame Rumple too much for Snow wanting  end her pain over losing Charming.

It was pretty hilarious that Charming thought that he could simply just grab Snow and kiss her without even making her remember him and think that would break the spell.  I wouldn't have expected anything less of Snow when she punched him out.  However, it didn't really take very much (if you consider a serious wound nothing) for Charming to win her over.  He simply had to jump in the way of her arrow aimed at the Queen and declare that he would die for her.  Snow stupidly asks, "You would die for me?"  The man had a freaking arrow sticking out of his arm.  If he had leaped in a different way that damn arrow could have easily pierced an organ that would have killed him.  Come on now, Snow.  I also find it funny that they were having a makeout session after their true love kiss broke the spell (I was little more happy to see them reconnect than I had thought) while that arrow was still sticking out of him.  I wondered when the hell his wound was going to be important enough to take care of.

I didn't get to find this out since King George's men showed up (I thought they were the Queen's men at first) and took Charming away.  But I liked that it turned the tables and now Snow has to go save him.  Of course, now that she's not a bitch anymore, her dwarf friends are more than happy to help her out.  Thank goodness.  Snow is pretty brave, but I doubt she could do it on her own.

Now back to Storybrooke where MM is sinking deeper and deeper into the case of Kathryn's disappearance.  Through some questioning by Emma, which is observed by Mayor Bitch, we find out that the box with the heart in it is MM's jewelry box.  That's just too convenient for it not to be a setup.  And how dare the mayor suggest that the dark place she was sent to when the old sheriff humiliated her was the same as MM and David's situation.  Lady, please!  She further urged Emma to accept MM was a killer by saying such heartbreak and betrayal can make someone do unspeakable things.  Yeah, you would know, Mayor Bitch--you crushed a man's heart and killed him because he dumped you!  Ridiculous.  She was basically on a role of pointing the fingers at herself for setting up MM; she later tells Emma that MM had to have taken the jewelry box out to the bridge herself because there were no signs of a break-in.  Bitch, we all know you have a key to every damn thing in the whole town.

However, Emma had no idea about this and her investigation of their apartment only ended up revealing another item that could incriminate MM.  I just now realized that the mayor intentionally brought up the idea of a break-in to Emma so that she would purposely find that knife in the heating vent!  I can't believe I didn't notice that before.  That bitch is slick.  Thankfully, Henry steals Mayor Bitch's many keys and finds that one of them can indeed open their apartment.  I'm just worried that she'll notice the keys are missing before Henry can put them back, letting her know that Emma is on to her.

One of my favorite scenes in the Storybrooke world is when Mr. Gold appears out of nowhere to offer his lawyer services to MM.  Well, he is the devil, but with him handling her case, MM should get off with little problem.  The only problem will be her having to pay off the debt she owes to him.  However, I'm pretty sure that Mr. Gold is only concerned with knocking the Queen off her throne and establishing himself as the dominant power.  So perhaps he will be true to his word about only being "invested in her future."  If they have to have both him and his fairy tale counterpart say that, it's gotta be important.

You would think MM went through enough with all the evidence piling up against her and having to take help from the most suspicious and crooked man in town, but David came to the "rescue."  He thought he could help her by finding evidence of his own guilt in Kathyrn's death (which slightly redeemed him in my eyes a moment) by clearing up some of the blackouts he had recently.  Instead of being helpful, he only remembers a bit from his life as Charming when Snow declares she will kill the Queen.  He doesn't even take much time to consider if the memory is real or not and visits MM, not with hope, but with an obvious accusation that she murdered Kathryn.  David, are you really in love with MM or are you finding pleasure in betraying her at every opportunity?  For real.  What the hell??  MM has really gone beyond what any sane woman would for someone like him, defending his innocence, while he can't even manage to have a fraction of reciprocal faith.  You asshole!  You could have at least pretended you found out you were the killer and protected her!  Why not just take the blame when it's all your damn fault anyway??  Snow may have not needed that potion Rumple gave her, but MM sure as hell does.  I hope something happens that she hits her head or something and his face is wiped clean from her brain.

I'm worried, though, about MM flying off the handle now that David has seemed to give up on her.  Emma sure hasn't, but I feel like MM wasn't honest that she had faith in her, not just because she used that key she found to escape from her cell.  That key looks an awful lot like one of Mayor Bitch's, so I hope it's not another setup to show that she's fleeing out of guilt of her crime.  I wonder how Emma will react when she finds out that MM is gone?

In the next episode, I hope things will be a little better for MM even though it's not looking good for her at all.  David sure as hell better get his ass kicked or something of equal unpleasantness to punish him for his lack of faith.  I don't feel great about Emma aligning herself with Mr. Gold either, but at least it's better than her facing Mayor Bitch on her own.  She might have a chance to get that whore before she gets MM in line to be executed or something.  Also, since MM is free from the jail she best be out to get the mayor like Snow was out to get the Queen.  MM is way past due to take a vacation from her sweet and loving personality and be a vengeful warrior taking numbers as she kicks ass.

Don't See Why Dwarves Don't Use The Axes To End It All

Once Upon A Time, S01E14

In the other world, dwarfs are born from eggs and live a loveless existence, knowing little of the world beyond the diamond mines.  But, hey, they get to spread joy to everyone else in the world with the fairy dust that is made from the diamonds--it all equals out, right?  Seriously, sometimes this show depresses me.  Of course, there are many things in reality that are far more depressing than little men forced to be miners for their entire lives, but I don't watch shows like this to think about the suffering in the world.  I'm just saying--those dwarfs in the fairy tale world get screwed over pretty well.  And who in the hell is making those eggs they come out of??  I suppose they can't have factories where the full-grown men are born; this is a magical place.  Eggs it is.  Still, when a human-like creature pops out of an egg and their kind is noted for lacking females, I can't easily go along with it.

OK, enough with that head-scratcher.  I think that Leroy and Astrid's romance was cute, but awfully fast-paced (as much as it can be for a nun and a drunk).  He fell for her so easily and was ready to give her the moon in a second.  Even for love-at-first-sight, he was a little too forthcoming.  Leroy told her all about his life's dream within a few minutes.  Then again, maybe that's something he does every time someone insinuates that his custodial profession isn't the most glamorous career.  This aside, they made an interesting couple with her being a klutzy dreamer and him being a scruffy scamp.  Luckily, they seemed to make a significant connection in the current world, even though there were some hiccups.

My favorite of such bumps along the road was when Leroy tried to save Astrid by selling his dream boat to Mr. Gold in exchange for money or to extend their rent payment date.  Mr. Gold reveals another level to his status of being a heartless old miser by refusing to deal with Leroy if his intention was to save the nuns.  Apparently they were a "distasteful" group that he has a "complicated" relationship with.  God, how I wanted to know more about that!  What made me love Mr. Gold even more at that moment was Leroy pointing out how surprised he was that when it came to getting his money, Mr. Gold had no special place in his heart for the Sisters:

You don't like nuns?  Who doesn't like nuns?

 It's good that I was thoroughly engaged in Leroy's story well enough that I hadn't been wondering when Mr. Gold was going to make his appearance, but I was glad when he did and have no complaints about the length he was around.  He was there long enough to kick down another person in need of money before he shuffled away with his cane.  Gotta love him.

 Another good that came out of Leroy and Astrid's "love affair," was that MM seemed to gain a little perspective about her own harlot-status while watching Leroy fight for a romance that could never be.  In fact, Leroy was great at not giving up, despite MM wanted to throw in the towel.  He even imparted upon her some wisdom about the value of creating good moments, despite they may be short-lived:

Isn't that what life's about?  Holding on to your good memories?

Indeed.  I think Leroy was just what the doctor ordered to kick MM in the ass and make her stop wallowing in self-pity.  And in the end, after they sold all the candles that seemed impossible to sell (really? everyone managed to buy off 1000 candles in one night??), some of the townspeople seemed to be warming up to MM again.  That was a nice moment that gave me those warm fuzzies I usually don't get when watching TV.

Possibly David is headed to jail for Kathryn's disappearance and the Mayor and Sidney are trying to set him up, but who gives a damn?  If MM was smart she'd keep out of it because he deserves whatever setup they are trying to pull.  But MM won't.  She'll believe in David, despite he acted like an ass.  And speaking of asses, I was so annoyed by the Mayor telling Emma to do her job or she'd find someone else to do it.  Bitch, shut up!  So tired of her trying to tell Emma how to do her job.  I was happy, though, she was barely in this episode and not preventing more love connections.

This was an unexpectedly fairly good episode about lesser characters.  However, maybe I'm a little more inclined to enjoy this story after I haven't seen much TV lately that I liked as a whole.  Either way, I think that Once Upon a Time has a good chance of fixing a spot in my primary shows if it indeed makes it to a second season.