Lisa "Cantwell" Them All

The Simpsons, S24E15

Lisa's new substitute was exactly what Lisa had wished for in a teacher, except that she hated Lisa's guts.  Lisa, while racking her brain to find out how she rubbed the woman in the wrong way, continued to be bullied by her new teacher.  Homer went too far with Ned and made him punch him in the eye.  Ned tried to make things right with Homer, but Homer refused to hit him back and make the two of them even while Homer still felt like the better man.

What I liked most overall about Lisa's story was just the idea that even an apple-polisher like Lisa can meet a teacher that doesn't like her.  She might be smart and obedient, but that doesn't mean as a student she's always going to be the star.  I mean, I thik even Mrs. Hoover began to dislike Lisa after a while.  There have been plenty of times that Lisa's made her miserable with her overachieving.  Still, I feel like usually one wouldn't hate Lisa from just a few seconds with her.  I liked that no matter how hard Lisa tried, Ms. Cantwell just couldn't be won over.

Another great point about this story was that Ms. Cantwell was voiced by Tina Fey, giving her an authentically smart-sounding voice.  Hearing her play a teacher reminded me of the movie Mean Girls, where she had to deal with some not entirely likeable girls.  I think this role couldn't have been played better by anyone else.

There few a few specific things that I liked from this story.  The first was when Marge pretended to put a chincilla coat on Lisa to make her fall back to sleep.  It's funny that she doesn't mind making Lisa faint in horror in order to make sure her child is well-rested.  The next is my favorite part where Mrs. Krabapple put Bart into Ms. Cantwell's class.  Bart's entrance was accompanied by demonic-sounding music, and her few minutes of absence gave him enough time to make the room look like a disaster.  I loved how Bart was just circling around in a lawnmover for no reason--what the hell?  That was more than enough to justify her early resignation.  Plus, she still refused to like Lisa, even if she could get Bart's terror to end.  Now that's some deep hatred.

My favorite line also came from this story.  Apparently Ms. Cantwell thought that Skinner and Chalmers were partners:

You two are the worst-dressed gay men I've ever met!

This was just a good story all around.  I even liked that the reason she hated Lisa was because she looked like a pretty, party girl.  It's weird that anyone would mistake Lisa for that type of girl when she's such a bookworm wouldn't even know how to handle a book about partying.

Homer and Ned's story was also good, but not as good as Lisa's.  It was mainly shocking to see Ned punch Homer in the face when he's probably needed to do that on a million other cases where Homer was doing much more terrible things to him.  I suppose Ned was already on edge from his parents being in town, and we all know that his parents are the cause of his anger.  Homer could have just been the icing on the cake.

Speaking of his parents, I swear that we saw them when Ned and Edna got married and they didn't look as old as they did in this episode.  They should look pretty ancient, considering that Ned is even older than Homer, but it's just weird to see their character designs change so recently.  I don't know.  That bothered me at first.

One of the funniest things about this story was just seeing Homer get along so well with Ned's parents.  It was like they were old friends.  Homer's already annoying to Flanders, so to see Ned pissed off even more when Homer was laughing and getting high with his parents was amusing.  All of Ned's sources for rage were right in front of him.  It makes sense that he might throw a fist or two.

My favorite part was when Ned was having trouble sleeping.  He reluctantly took what he referred to as an "sleeping aid," but was just some graham crackers and milk.  I loved that!  Only Ned would be able to make that work for him like that.

One last thing I laughed at was the end where Ned and Homer were praying.  Homer didn't even realize what he was doing on his knees:

This is praying? Let me out of here!

That joke reminds me of some seasons back when Homer was horrified that he was reading a real bible, not the fake one he kept his flask in.

This was one of my favorites episodes so far.  I guess I can always say that it could have been funnier, but that's just a hazard of coveting the earlier seasons that I can still laugh at today.  It was great to see Lisa being tormented by a teacher who refused to like her instead of seeing teachers treat her like a prized jewel.  It is messed up that a teacher would single out a student like that, but since it was Lisa it made the situation funny.  It was even funnier that just a glimpse of what horror Bart could add to the classroom was enough to get Lisa's bully to leave the school.  Ned lost control and finally got a little revenge on Homer, but it worked against him because it made him seem like the aggressor rather than the victim.  I liked, though, that Homer joined forces with Ned's parents and got him to that boiling point.  Since they initiated such an interesting story, it's a shame that they can't visit Ned a little more often.

Being A Heel Is Cool

The Simpsons, S024E14

Homer's new interest in buying storage lockers at auctions led him to discover his father's collection of wrestling gear.  Thanks to Bart's interest and Mr. Burns' fondness for his persona Glamorous Godfrey, Abe was convinced to get into the ring again, despite having to play the part of a villain.

When I realized that this episode was going to be about Grandpa and another of his past occupations, I felt like Marge did when she found out that Abe wasn't gay at all.  We've already seen a few stories about hm this season and none of them have been really excellent.  This one wasn't bad (like the others), but I think I enjoyed the sentimental part of it better.  Under Burns' spell, Abe began to think that being a heel had its benefits, and as a bonus, his grandson started to admire him.  It's not often that you see Bart wanting to imitate someone in his family, so to see him taking after his grandfather was cute, even if it was encouraging him to be more of a jerk than usual.  This was an interesting way for Abe and Bart to have common ground--who would have thought that Grandpa used to wrestle as a vain, cheating show-boat?  Plus, Abe was able to reclaim Bart's soul without causing Bart to feel like his grandfather was uncool again.  It was just as fun for Bart to be Laddie Liberty and beat up on Burns as it was for him to be Beautiful Bart (his hair in the latter was strangely adorable).

This story also included a song, something we haven't heard in a while (unless you count those songs that Abe sang in that other story about him as a songwriter).  The melody and the lyrics for the most part were terrible, and Burns sang it pretty badly, I thought.  He's most famous for singing "See My Vest" from earlier seasons, so I don't know why his voice sounded so pitiful in this song.  What I did like was when Burns listed some villians that you love to hate, lining himself up with such notables as Eric Cartman, Megatron, Skeletor, and Voldemort.  Now that was pretty damn funny.  You could, of course, argue that all of these villains have varying levels of evil, but they are popularly hated characters nonetheless.  Him singing about that just makes me imagine all these guys hanging out having beers or something, boasting stories that try to top the others in bad deeds.  I really like the thought of that.  Otherwise, that song was pretty forgettable, and I wouldn't say that I thought it was essential.

One other thing that was funny to me was when Grandpa was recalling the negative side of playing a heel:

But there was a downside to being hated:  being hated.

I love when they have lines like this where they are a bit redundant.

This was an okay episode.  I'd want to watch it again to catch some of the little things I missed the first time.  It had a fairly cute story to it, and I enjoyed watching Bart look up to Abe instead of dreading the day he'd become his father's father.  It might have made a better story to have Abe end up being gay like Marge wanted, but changing details like that in this point of the game would probably be hard to swallow.  But I still like wondering how the story would have turned out if they did need to find Abe a man to love.  I'm sure it would have made a much more, albeit unbelievable, interesting story.

Milhouse Walks In Kirk's Shoes

The Simpsons, S24E13

Bart decided to make Milhouse pretend to be Kirk when he accidentally shaved his head similar to Kirk's hairstyle.  Bart and Milhouse enjoyed going around town reaping the benefits that only adults could take advantage of.  Homer's obsession with find-it books increased his ability to find things that were out of place.

The novelty of Milhouse dressing up like Kirk was short-lived for me.  At first it seemed like this story was going to go in a good direction, but Bart and Milhouse didn't really do anything that special as far as what they could do as an adult.   My favorite thing that they did was go into Moe's, not to drink, but to ask Moe where babies came from.  Moe's response was intensely disturbing:

Ah, well, in my case my mom was hit with a voodoo curse, I gestated for five years, and then I popped out backwards and on fire.

I like when they make Moe sound inhumane like that.   Over the years he's become more and more of a monster.

Unrelated to the Milhouse story, really, there were a few good lines.  One was when Marge took Lisa to this puppet show that Lisa had suggested.  They soon saw that it was going to be a bunch of puppets getting killed:

[Marge] Maybe we should go.

[Knight] Nobody leave until every puppet dead.

What kind of sickos make you watch puppets get killed?  I like when stuff goes from creepy to scary.

Finally, I liked when Homer asked Marge about Highlights magazine:

[Homer] Marge, can I get a subscription to Highlights magazine?

[Marge] Homer, that's for children.

[Homer] Where does it say that?!

[Marge] Read the rest of the title!

[Homer] Highlights for...doh! 

It was kinda cool that Homer got this "superpower" of detection after reading so many children's books.  This skill turned out to be useful, even when him noticing the free breakfast on a banner seemed to suggest he had forgotten about the kids.  Although, Homer had zeroed in on the free food, he succeeded in finding the kids.  I don't know how he would have been able to otherwise just looking on the streets for something strange.

I also liked the very end of the episode where Homer got mad at Bart for saying that he hoped that he didn't end up looking like Homer.  He was strangling him and complaining that Bart's comment didn't allow them to end things on a heart-warming note.  I liked this because if Homer and Bart hadn't had that moment, it would have ended that way.

Although there wasn't a bunch that I liked from this episode, I still feel like it was good.  I say that because there wasn't anything particularly bad about it.  I just wish that Bart and Milhouse had gotten more creative in what they could do with adult power in their hands.  Homer surprisingly improved himself by reading a children's book.  If only he could read a kid's book that would teach him how to pay attention and work harder.  He might turn into a decent employee.

Bart's Not Meant To Have A Girlfriend

The Simpsons, S24E12

Bart didn't have any idea of how neglectful he was being of his girlfriend who was finally back in town.  Despite all the signs, Bart was dumped and later sent out of the house with Homer when the two upset Marge.  Finally the severity of the situation dawned on Bart and he and Homer arranged a grand gesture for the ladies in their life at the bachelor apartments.

It was a surprise to see Zooey Deschanel back on the show in what seems so soon.  I felt like we closed the chapter on the relationship between Mary and Bart in New York, but apparently not.  It's evident that Bart is nowhere ready to have a girlfriend since his dating history has been about the same throughout the years.  It was a little sad to watch Bart show once again that he doesn't know what to do with a girl he likes (with reason, as he is just a kid).  I kept hoping that Bart would come to his senses before it was too late, but I guess he has indeed taken after Homer and only notices he's fallen off the cliff when he's already hit the ground.

It was almost funny that Marge tossed Bart and Homer out of the house when they were acting like thoughtless men, but it didn't amount to much.  It was more creepy and pathetic that they were in this apartment complex with other guys who didn't know how to keep their women happy.  I did find one thing that made me laugh before the story ended, but it hardly made up for the story on a whole being a bit depressing.

This was when they were watching the movie "Love, Indubitably" and Snape from Harry Potter popped out randomly to say:

Love is more powerful than all my magic.

That really caught me off guard.  Even for them to be spoof Love Actually that was so ridiculous.  It's strangly one of my favorite parts from this season so far.

I'm sort of glad that Bart didn't end up with Mary in the end.  It wouldn't have made any sense otherwise.  Bart doesn't appreciate her, and he just never will.  I don't think Bart is capable of loving a girl right or smart enough to understand when someone isn't happy with him.  Mary would have been a moron not to walk off with another boy.  I felt bad for Bart, though, but at least he could still stalk her online.

Oh, I did also like Mary's song about Bart after they broke up.  The lyrics were really hurtful to Bart, but I liked the samba beat to it and Zooey has always had a beautiful singing voice.  It doesn't have the charm of the songs heard earlier in this show's history, but I feel like if I hear the song enough times it's going to grow on me (like many of their songs have).

Lastly, I thought it was cute that Bart was dressed up like Woody Allen, I guess.  Then at the end Bart didn't even know who he was, at least not in his most famous capacity.  That joke wasn't too bad--it made Bart's outfit and narration throughout the episode more ironic.

This episode was too downbeat for my tastes.  I don't really want to see Bart have his heart crushed whether it's his fault or not.  There weren't any saving graces for this story even with the hilarious Snape bit and Zooey's song.  If I had to put a positive spin on it, I think I can say this is the real end of the Mary and Bart story.  It would be torture to see Bart mess things up with her for a fourth time.

What If Bart Had Failed?

The Simpsons, S24E10

To cut costs, the school with the lowest standardized test scores would be shut down, and Springfield Elementary's only hope of staying open was determinate upon Bart's score on the test.  Homer also found a parking meter at the dump and was tricking people into paying it at various locations around town.

I actually would have liked to see what became of the kids if they were sent to different, horrible schools.  Although, since Springfield is the worst school in the state, it couldn't have been worse (at least academically).  I was sort of rooting for Bart to fail, which it looked like he was going to do because he didn't put an ounce of effort into studying.  It reminded me of that very earlier episode where Bart had to study really hard to stop himself from being held back.  He studied really hard and failed, but proved that he had learned something and got a little extra credit.  In this episode, he just had pure luck, and a bug happened to fill in the last question correctly for him.  I guess that's more likely than Bart doing well on a test through his own merits.  That, short of someone dressing up like Bart and taking the test for him, was one of the few ways it was going to work to keep the school open (status quo).  Again, though, I would have liked to see the kids at a different school for a brief moment.

This story wasn't really funny, but I did find myself laughing when Bart imagined that Groundskeeper Willie was lowering a dead Skinner from a flagpole and folding him into a triangle.  That was a little twisted, but for some reason I had to laugh.  I guess it was because it was such a serious moment for Bart and he was still thinking about screwing Skinner over.  No wonder they were ready to knock down the school as soon as the test was over--Bart was so freaking unreliable.

I also liked one line from the proctor concerning the kids' test results:

This place is worse than the elementary school in prison.  This student filled in everything but the ovals.

This story really reminded me of how dumb the kids are at that school.  With kids doing the direct opposite of what they're supposed to do in a test, I'm not entirely sure it's because of the lackluster staff that teach them that they can't even fill in circles.

Homer's story was sort of cute.  I mean, there's nothing like watching Homer going around trying to scam people for a quick buck, especially if it's in a way that seems more trouble than it's worth.  It reminds me of the time he had the telemarketing scam going on--he was right that this fake parking meter was his most successful business.  The thing that was dumb was that he went to spend the money at a bus station pay-TV.  He might as well have been tossing all the money he "worked" for down a well (which he did, in a disappointing conclusion).  Then again, I guess Homer couldn't very well go around town spending quarters like that when there was a news report about his illegal activities.  Still, it would have been nice to see him do something fun with that money before Marge found out and made him do the "right" thing.

Oh, I also thought the couch gag was nice.  Usually, I just ignore it and just wish the episode would start, but I liked seeing them make them sitting on the couch see like a dramatic, action-packed movie trailer.  The tagline "Don't get too comfortable" made me laugh.

This episode was a little better than some of the others just because it wasn't very annoying in any way really.  I tend to like the stories that revolve around the school, especially when the main character is going to be Bart.  He's shown that when push comes to shove, some kind of unbelievable luck will pull him through and never any kind of effort upon his part (at least where learning is concerned) will.  Homer and his parking meter were a great pair in business, but he barely even got to enjoy the fruits from his misdeeds.  I miss Homer trying all these bad ideas to get money outside of doing his own job properly--it feels like we don't get to see him doing nearly enough of that nowadays.

For the 23th Special, Pretty Good

The Simpsons, S24E02

A black hole that Lisa had a hand in bringing about was sucking everything in Springfield into it.  Homer filmed some paranormal things going on in the house, revealing a demon that wanted to take Maggie.  Bart went back in time to buy a comic book for less and ended up changing the present to his benefit but to Homer's disadvantage.

Surprisingly, I enjoyed this Treehouse of Horror this year.  It wasn't one of my favorites of all time, but it was definitely good enough that I felt like I'd like to see it again to see what little things I missed in it.  My favorite of the three was probably the last where Bart went into the past and made it so that he was Artie Ziff's son.  However, I will say that the second story, where they spoofed Paranormal Activity was a close second.

The first story where a black hole was sucking everything had a lot of good parts.  In a way, I felt like it was kinda spoofing Gremlins because Lisa specifically told the family not to feed it and they all kept throwing things into it while knowing the danger.  My favorite thing thrown in was Bart's homework that kept getting spat out, and Bart finally gave up and threw Mrs. Krabapple (or should I call her Mrs. Flanders?) in there.  The best line of the story was when Homer said:

A black hole?! (whispers) I'm sorry, can we call it that?

Anytime someone says something like that, I pretty much enjoy it.

The second story was a pretty good spoof of the aforementioned movie.   In general, I just liked seeing Homer and Marge act like the couple in that movie, but putting their own funny spin on it.  Specifically, I liked when Homer tried to "comfort" Lisa when she asked why all these horrible things were happening in their house:

Oh, sweetie.  Sometimes a mysterious, invisible being from Hell waits for a family to go to sleep then kills them.  Now, go to bed.

I really like when Homer says things in a comforting way, but his actual words are doing the direct opposite.  I almost always laugh when he does that.

I also thought it was funny at the end that the demon wanted a threeway with Homer and another demon if he wanted to save Maggie from being taken.  That's not what I thought would happen at all!  Then Homer was sort of a little too into it to the point that the demon wanted him to stop whatever new sex thing he was trying out.  Gross, but damn funny.

The last story was probably my favorite because I like when they do stories in different timelines.  Also, this is the second time that Bart has met Homer in the past (another was in the episode that spoofed Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind), and it was so easy for Bart to screw up his parents' first meeting.  I really liked how angry Homer got at Bart and how repulsed Marge was by his treatment of him.  Then it just got better when Bart easily accepted that Homer was out of his life when he returned to the present to find he was rich and a Ziff (plus he just looked so cute with that little afro).  It continued to be entertaining when teenage Homer traveled forward in time with Bart and met his older self and they worked together to beat Bart at his own game.  I guess I'm a sucker for happy endings because I liked that even though Artie and Bart beat the crap out of all the members of the United Federation of Homers Through History, Marge realized her mistake and took in all of those guys into her home (I don't know how she'd feed them and pay for all the destruction they would do, though).  I liked all the different Homers and how none of them could find the time to take out the trash in a whole day.  Marge has to love Homer because there is no way anyone could tolerate more than one Homer at one time.

The opening animation about the end of the world according to the Mayan calendar was a little interesting, but not that funny.  I just like how it could have been prevented if Marge didn't help Homer and hadn't had Moe sacrificed instead.

I'm pretty pleased with this episode, and I hope that they deliver more stories like this in the season.  After last week's disappointment of doing New York City again, I'm happy that there's a glimmer of hope for this season yet!  Maybe there will be a hilarious episode down the road if I'm lucky.

The Simpsons Redo The Big Apple

The Simpsons, S024E01

To start off their 24th season, the Simpsons returned to New York City so that Bart could find Mary.  He was determined to find at least one of his ex-loves who still liked him after getting to know him.  Lisa and Marge also tried to see a play in the city, but eventually had to settle with doing a play themselves.

Well, I didn't like much about this episode, especially since it was sort of a repeat story in a way.  I mean, we already had a story with Mary not too long ago, while the Simpsons going to New York isn't that exciting (although, we have to give them a little slack with that because they've traveled a ton of places already).  They did have the opportunity to do the town a new justice, but it fell flat with few jokes that made it seem like they couldn't have just done the same thing anywhere else.  It was nice to see a story about Bart that wasn't about his mischief but him wanting to find acceptance instead, but that aspect wasn't enough to save the story for me.  And the side story where Marge and Lisa were searching to watch a play didn't do much for me either.

Despite my complaints, there were a few moments that I liked.  In particular, I enjoyed when Homer was explaining to Bart about how drunk dialing allows one to express feeling,s and he later drunk dialed him.  Later, when Bart is revisiting his past girlfriends and such, that wasn't entirely unfunny either.  I forget the girl's name, but I liked the part where he saw the black-haired girl who sends Bart mixed signals.  She might be one of my favorites even though she was quite bipolar in how she would treat Bart from second to second.  I also was a little tickled by Homer's recollection of what happened the last time he went to New York, and it showed him in some jazz bar or something playing a xylophone.  It was referencing something I didn't get, but I just like how it went totally against what I thought Homer would picture.

Besides these moments, my favorite was when Homer and some random people from the subway were in the cab and the driver told them:

Anything you leave in the cab, you'll never see again.

and Homer was trying to leave Bart in there was he was still sleeping.  I expected him to do this, but it was still funny that he was sneaking out of the cab before Bart woke up and saw him.  Wish there were more jokes like that.

Finally, I also think that Homer helped me enjoy the episode a little better when he talking to Bart after he arrived at Mary's apartment but she wasn't home:

You've learned a very valuable life lesson, boy.  Which is that love doesn't exist except briefly between a man and woman before marriage.  After that it's just hanging out with someone who kinda hates you but you can't get it together to leave .

As far as Bart's romance with Mary, I found it surprisingly very boring.  I'm not sure why, but it might have to do with the fact that Mary just so easily accepted Bart for who he was.  I dunno.  I guess I didn't feel their connection.  Nor was I thrilled or amused that Zoey Deschanel was a guest actress.  Her song, too, was terrible.  I long for the days where I loved the songs on this show.  But I gotta accept that it's a new era of this show.

I'd say this premiere was a little of a let down.  Since I watched it instead of Once Upon A Time (which I was thoroughly looking forward to), I feel like it was a mistake.  However, I'm just so used to spending Sunday nights watching the FOX cartoon lineup that it just seems wrong not to tune in.  However, if this is an indication of what season 24 is going to be like, I might have to catch up on this show the following day instead.  Next time they are showing Treehouse of Horrors already.  I'm thoroughly surprised, considering that sometimes we don't get to see it until November!  The previews don't look that promising, but I'll still hope they manage to have a decent Halloween special this year.

Fattening Up Nelson? Good Plan

The Simpsons, S23E20

Homer got time off from work after Burns gave him a concussion, but he decided not to tell his family because they were all too uninterested in his stories to listen (or just generally mad at him).  He sent the time with his Dr. Cain, a movie character that he envisioned from the blow to his head.  With Cain's help, Homer learned how to be a better husband, but attracted the attention of a jealous husband with a gun.  The husband came after Homer again when he was romancing Marge on a date, but he was able to charm himself out of death with one of the techniques that Cain taught him.  Bart tried to get rid of Nelson's bullying by fattening him up with Krusty Burger food.  However, thanks to Lisa complaining to Krusty, Nelson was trained into an even more powerful bully than before.

Homer's story was mostly strange than it was funny.  I liked that he was hanging out with a movie character voiced by Bryan Cranston, but it was weird that a hallucination was giving him helpful advice (and being kind of creepy when he was watching Homer make out with Marge).  Before Homer started listening to an invisible man, I liked when he and Mr. Burns were discussing Homer's compensation for the concussion Burns had caused: 

[Burns] Fine.  8 weeks off with pay. 

[Homer screams]  

[Burns] That's a good thing.

[Homer] But you said it so mean.

Since that was about the only amusing thing in that story, I liked Bart's story slightly more.  My favorite line from it was when Bart was complaining to Milhouse about Nelson:

[Milhouse] My mom says bully only bully cuz they're scared. 

[Nelson] Your mom's next!

 I just didn't expect Nelson to be listening  their conversation, nor to go after his "creator" for a comment she had told her son.  Then he actually went to her and insulted her son and poured out her hair dye.

What I liked most about Bart's story was that he got the idea to fatten up Nelson from a Supersize Me spoof documentary that he saw in class.  That documentary was nothing too amazing except the part at the end where Decland had to have nuggets IV-ed into his arm to survive.  That was really gross!  But I applaud Bart for actually learning during class and coming up with a cruel, but effective plan to get Nelson out of his hair.  I mean, if you think about it, Bart was doing a nice thing for Nelson, who probably never uses the money he steals for food anyway.  If Nelson had just used the free coupons he had been given more sparingly, he could have eaten free food for a long time.  Instead, I'm sure that he probably blew through those coupons in like a week or two.  It's a sick plan to endanger someone's health like that, but Nelson, too, endangers children's health (though not to such a crippling degree).  I kind of wish that Lisa hadn't intervened because Bart's plan was working so well for everyone and in the end they all had to be pummeled by a ripped Nelson.  Good job, Lisa.  I don't think there was much of a lesson there at all, except that learning at school can be dangerous if you're evil enough.

Not one of the best ones this season, but not too bad for one that had a guest star.  Seeing Homer reinvent himself to make Marge a happier wife is nothing they haven't done a million times, so it wasn't the most inspired story, but I think that Bart's was a little more creative and enjoyable.  I just wish that there had been a more satisfying ending.  But at this stage of this show, you can't expect the writers to have deliver the complete package like viewers were accustomed to back in the day.

Still The Best Simpson Vacation Yet

The Simpsons, S23E19

Bart, tired of the humdrum of the everyday, tried to raise money to go on a fancy cruise by selling everything in his room.  The others eventually helped him pay for it by selling some of their own things.  Their time on the cruise kept getting better and better, making everyone happier than they had ever been.  Bart started to think about how it would all end in a week when he heard a song about the limited time of their vacation happiness.  He used a scene from a movie to make everyone think that the world was infected by a virus so that the ship would have to stay at sea forever.  It took only 12 days to turn the paradise ship into an apocalyptic nightmare where food was scarce and fun and entertainment had been replaced with fear and mob rule.  Bart confessed to his ruse after Lisa and Marge discovered what he had done, and the people of the cruise rewarded him by abandoning the family in Antarctica.  That turned out to be a blessing for Bart, who came to understand he should enjoy the great moments in life instead of dwelling on the routine in the rest of it through his observations of the penguins.

After watching so many episodes where everything that could go wrong in a vacation does for this family, it was nice to see everyone having a great time on the boat.  Something, of course, had to upset their paradise or it would be boring, but seeing everything go right for once was a nice change.  Plus, the Simpsons are like my family so seeing their enjoying themselves made me smile.  I thought it was funny how that song at dinner was so depressing about how their happiness would end once they got off the boat, but only Bart was paying attention.  Everyone else was "enjoying it while it lasted," per the song's advice.  I couldn't be mad at Bart for wanting to make it last forever.  I often feel like that and in doing so, ruin my chance to enjoy the now (which is the point).  So I really identified with the overall message in this story.

I got a little sad watching Bart imagine his life after he left the boat and his only good memory was him on that vacation.  He died while holding the only picture of his happiness, and it made me a little misty-eyed.  That's pretty terrible for a boy his age to be writing off his own life before it had barely started.  I was even a little down by seeing the montage of his daily routine that ended on the couch.  His childhood should be some of the best times in his life, but instead he was disillusioned by age 10.

When they were cast off the boat to Antarctica, I couldn't help but wonder how the hell they were gonna get back home.  They never answered that, but I guess that's the magic of a cartoon where you can leave things open like that because it will have no impact upon the next episode.  I didn't like that they started to look at the penguins and use them as an example of how to live life better.  It was corny, but it was better than everyone being angry at Bart, and it distracted me of thoughts of how long it would take them to freeze (or starve) to death.  But I liked how Bart stopped trying to make every day fun and instead had a wider variety of moments he could cherish in his new vision of his old age.  He remarked in that vision, "What a great ride," and it reminded me of how I'll probably feel about this show ending one day.  Not every story was one I'll remember forever and find myself quoting in daily life, but I have enjoyed this show's ride so far.  The numbers of years they kept me laughing and thinking is more than enough to excuse any number of episodes that failed to meet my expectations.

Call me a softie, but I liked this episode a lot, despite it was more sentimental than it was funny.  Sometimes that is what I want to see--a nice, heartwarming story where it's not about how much you can shock or thrill the audience.  I'm happy to see that this show can still tug at my heart strings after all this time and not make me want to roll my eyes or gouge them out.

Stranded On The Treadmill

The Simpsons, S23E18

Homer got obsessed with a Lost-parody show called "Stranded" that he started watching on his treadmill.  Marge, after putting up with his obsession for long enough, ruined the show for him by explaining all the mysteries he had yet to figure out.  She apologized for it later by decorating their room in an deserted island-like fashion.  Bart had to watch over Jimbo's girlfriend and found himself cheating with her behind his bully's back.  He had to pay the price for that with Jimbo, but his girlfriend did take Bart's advice that she could do better than Jimbo.

I guess that Springfield is supposed to be in Oregon, according to the opening credits.  Is anyone still even worrying about that insignificant matter nowadays?  I always thought it was nice that they just denied that Springfield was anywhere by referring to impossible geographical details throughout the show.  It was a long-running joke that I enjoyed.  I don't like too much that they felt it was necessary to point that out (if they were being serious, anyway).  Any fan could easily look up where the creator grew up and figure out the state that inspired Springfield.  I feel like this is another ploy to get viewers (I'm sure that didn't work if it was).

It's funny that Homer was using his treadmill so much, but only to watch streaming videos.  I could totally see me doing that if I could afford a fancy treadmill like that with internet capabilities and a HD screen.  What was even funnier was that he set up a lawn chair on the sides so that he could just sit and watch (is it impossible to watch the screen without the belt moving?).  It's too bad he's creative with his laziness because with a TV on a piece of exercise equipment that might have been the best way to get Homer to exercise for more than a few seconds.

I also liked how they made fun of Lost.  I could identify with Homer's determination to figure out what it was all about and how ridiculously mysterious the show was (and not being too wowed by the final answers).  I wouldn't have gone as far to have a discussion group or a notebook of clues, but I also didn't watch the show until a few years after it had been completed, so I had to fight to remain ignorant of any spoilers others could provide me.  It would have been nice to have the air horn Homer had used on his friends.

I thought Bart's story wasn't much to talk about except the part where he freaked out after seeing Shanna's boobs.  I liked that his first comment was that they looked exactly like Homer's.  That's disgusting in such a humorous way.  Then at dinner, everything kept reminding him of breasts, which was a nice touch.  I thought that would keep him away from the girl permanently, but Bart kept seeing her until Jimbo found out.  Sometimes it's hard to remember that Bart is only 10 years old.  Since he does so many terrible things, I would just assume that not much could shock him.  Then again, Bart has shown several times that he has no idea how sex actually works (except in that one episode).  Still, it's easy to forget, which makes those kind of jokes with Bart work.

The ending, where Bart was finally caught by Jimbo, didn't have the consequences that I would have thought.  Jimbo was seen holding Bart upside down, but it really seemed like he got off pretty lightly.  I didn't think that Lisa or Shanna explained well enough to get Bart off the hook, so I don't know why Bart wasn't more brutally punished for his betrayal.  But then again, I wasn't that interested in the story to begin with, so I didn't really care what happened to Bart by then.

I actually liked Homer's story well enough that I liked the episode overall.  It's nice to see that as technology evolves to make it easier for people to exercise, Homer evolves his laziness just as well.  And I'm sure there are many people who might even pretend to go to the gym to work out, but spend more time watching movies on the machines more than anything else.  Mostly, I liked that they made fun of Lost in a way that I'm sure many fans of that show could relate to.  I'm always up for a good parody.

From Vandal To Artist

The Simpsons, S23E15

This was mainly a Bart-centered episode with a small story about Apu and a rival store.  Bart decides to graffiti Homer's image around town to get back at him for throwing him into a rabbit cage.  This wasn't nearly as bad as some of the other things he's done to Bart, so I don't really know why Bart was so outraged.  And in fact, Bart grew to like the cage.  I found the premise to be pretty weak, but this is the 23rd season, so what can you expect?

I thought this episode would be free of guest stars, but Shepard Fairey voiced himself (who later revealed to be  an undercover cop).  I suppose that's not too bad because I don't feel like he's such a celebrity that it will bring in a lot of viewers simply to hear him.  This episode was a sort of spoof of the documentary I had seen about a month ago, Exit Through the Gift Shop.  It not only featured Fairey, but other well-known street artists such as Banksy.  The Simpsons' take on graffiti wasn't particularly interesting, but it's interesting that someone like Fairey did a voice on this cartoon show.  If this episode does anything, I hope that it encourages people to watch that documentary because it's endlessly more interesting than what I saw on Sunday night.

Usually there is a side-story in each episode, but this one just seemed so unnecessary.  Sure the Kwik-E Mart is the go-to store in Springfield, but it's not the only place to buy food, so I wasn't buying Apu's pressure to take "Swapper Jack's" store down.  It was resolved so easily with the store selling monkey meat.  Really?  I would have been slightly more impressed if Apu started working there.  I know this show is known for its simple solutions to problems, but they might as well said a wizard came in and spirited the store away.

Speaking of simple solutions, Homer offers Wiggum the option of caging Bart again.  I didn't mind that too much, as it sort of brought things full circle.  Bart is caged, he rebels because of this cage, rebellion gets him put into cage again.  Not terribly exciting, but it works for this show at its present state.

I'm only surprised that the side-story didn't turn out to be about Marge being shunned by Paula Paul's fans or something of the like.  Her disappointment was only there to fuel Homer's rage so that he could throw Bart into a cage.  That's a bit disappointing.  I'm sure it could have led to a far better story than Apu robbing a store that Snake was working at.  The irony was lukewarm.

I'll give this show credit for possibly inspiring some people to google about Fairey and other street artists, but it wasn't very funny or original.  I'd really like to see them  produce an episode that makes me wonder if I'll care if there is a 24th season or not.  Right now, I'm almost hoping they won't before they come up with even worse stories.

500th Episode, Negative 500 Laughs

The Simpsons, S23E14

Now The Simpsons has made it to their 500th episode.  Wow, how times flies by.  That is an impressive milestone when you consider that there probably hasn't been a fabulous episode for about ten or so years (not consistently anyway).  This week's episode fell into that category, but it wasn't entirely terrible.

I enjoyed watching some of the old couch gags.  I didn't remember most of them, actually.  I suppose that is because I usually don't pay much attention until the episode truly starts.  A fairly good line at the beginning of the episode is when Homer tells Lisa to pick up a book:

[Lisa] I pick up books like you pick up beer!
[Homer] Then you have a serious reading problem.

After they get bored sitting around doing a disaster drill, the family decides to go out into town while everyone else is doing the drill.  They expect to find the town empty, but they see that everyone is gathered at a town meeting to discuss Springfield's most troublesome family, the Simpsons.  This mildly reminds me of The Simpsons Movie where the whole town turned against them, figuring that it's a bigger disadvantage to have them in town than not.  However, this time, we get to hear more about why each of them are a menace.  Bart and Homer are no-brainers; they destroy things on a regular basis with their antics.  But Lisa is seen as an eyesore for her meddlesome environmental endeavors, and Maggie is just seen as a devil baby of some sorts:

[Cookie] Even baby never cry!

[Maggie makes a throat cutting motion]

[Cookie] What baby does that? 

Even Marge isn't safe from being banned, despite her earnest plea for the town to not see her family as monsters.   Thanks to her tendency to present her family "in a more forgiving light," she is deemed the worst Simpson of all.  Nice.

They end up going to the "Outlands" after a resident threatens them with a gun and invites them.  I liked that they redid the opening scene in a more country, off the grid-like fashion.  Somehow this reminded me of The Riches, but I'm not sure if that was my imagination or something that the writers intended the viewers to think about.  Their lives there were less refined and almost completely boring.  What I liked most of their new lives was when Homer was tired of watching "fox" and there was an actual fox on a rock in front of them.  Maggie's little mohawk and aggressive actions were cute, though.  And I did enjoy when their neighbor (whose name escapes me) tells Homer that he should get out less.

Homer and Marge sneak back into Springfield after Marge laments her lost home.  They do this dressed as Mr. Burns and Smithers, and I was surprised that Homer didn't mess it up by forgetting Mr. Burn's catchphrase of "Excellent."  I guess they've already done that before, where Homer mistakenly thinks his phrase is "Exactly."  I love that episode, by the way. 

Since Homer doesn't mess it up, the two enjoy sneaking around town all the way back to their old house, where they are cornered by the majority of the town (if not the whole town).  This development is predictable and easily turns sentimental after Marge, with little convincing, tells them that they are the jerks, and she and Homer are returning to their real, better home.  The only thing that was notable about this scene was when the Mayor admits they are jerks, and Wiggum pulls out a spray of "Jerk Off," which he offers to spray on him.  Gross.  But mildly funny.

In the end, the whole town moves to the Outlands, wanting to escape from the choke hold of Springfield.  This was an easy solution to their problem and not very entertaining.  I only slightly liked that Moe's establishment in the Outlands was "Moe's Cavern," which was set up in a cave.  Everyone makes the move there, except Skinner who hasn't gotten the memo.  Bart later comes to get him, but I didn't expect him to actually carry him all the way.  He intentionally makes Skinner slam into things on the way, but I thought he might just drop his archenemy.  I guess that's just as good.

At the end, the show asks that we viewers go out and get some fresh air before they go on the internet to say how much the episode sucked.  That was a nice touch and makes me think that the staff realize how bad the show has gotten.  I'm wondering if they are under some pressure or obligation to keep the show on the air.  Well, if they keep losing viewers with these lackluster stories, they won't be able to afford to keep it on.  And they do have Family Guy and such, but I don't think that it can really fill the void The Simpsons will leave on FOX Sunday nights.  However, FG is popular, so you never know.  It could be celebrating its 500th episode one day.

I appreciate The Simpsons passing the test of time, but the 500th episode is not one I'm excited to see again.  I'm only happy there weren't too many guest stars in this episode.  They could have made a much bigger to-do about this milestone, but they didn't.  However, I'd like them to do stories that are a little more original and bring more laughs.

I Would Have Preferred A Rerun Of The "Love Day" Episode

Last night's The Simpsons was one of the better episodes from their 23th season.  Frankly, I'm getting sick of all the guest stars they've had recently.  That to me is a good sign that they are grasping at straws to keep the show on.  I've been a fan of this show since I was a child, and I don't really want to have to stop watching.  The Simpson family is almost like one of my own, and it's hard to imagine not seeing them with new adventures.  But come on...  Are writers really this bad nowadays or is it just impossible to write any more interesting stories for something that has done about everything you can over the 20 years?

They say this is 499th episode.  They have a big-to-do moment in the couch montage before Lisa reveals this fact to them, and Moe lets them know that FOX isn't going to celebrate it again.  Ha.

Lisa falls in love with a boy who writes in this Valentine's episode.  The boy is voiced by Michael Cera, who is an actor I enjoy, but I'm still wary of these tactics to get viewers to watch simply with semi-famous celebrities.  Their story is entertaining for a little bit, as Lisa rarely finds a boy that she can connect with, but it ultimately doesn't work out.  She was just swept away by the fantasy the boy was throwing at her and didn't see the reality of a relationship with a troubled writer.  Lisa's fascination caused a little rift between Marge and she, but they barely touched upon it.  I mean, Marge could have gone much further with jealousy that her daughter was growing apart from her, but they didn't.  She was a little disappointed, but nothing significant.  Weak.

Bart and Milhouse became myth-busters.  That was a little funny.  It worked to distract you from Lisa's lukewarm romance that we knew wouldn't last.  I liked that the two watched TV at a gas station to defy Marge telling them not to watch TV on the TV, computer, or smartphone.  They immediately went to find out if using cellphones at gas stations was dangerous, causing a sizable explosion.  That got a little chuckle from me.  But most of their myths were boring with subdued consequences.

My favorite thing about the episode was when Homer and Bart were hanging out together for Valentine's Day.  They may be at each other's worst enemies most of the time, but they are a darling son and father couple.  Homer's pretty lucky that he had a dumb son that can enjoy that reckless and brainless activities he enjoys himself.

This episode pales in comparison to episodes from about 10 or more years ago, but it was all right for a current season.  The best episode this season by far was the one with their future selves (The Simpsons are really good at stories with the future, which is probably why Futurama is so good).  Next episode, we need more Homer and less guest stars.  We get it--you don't know what you're doing writers, but you need to get to work and think outside of the box.