Being Black Ain't Bout the Crack

New Girl, S02E12

Jess invited Nick and Angie to a cabin getaway with her and Sam because she was nervous about being alone.  Things got awkward when they started drinking and some misunderstandings occurred.  Schmidt was also worried about Winston denying his real self and tried to make him feel at ease by doing things like taking him to go buy crack, unaware that Winston was just playing him.

I couldn't imagine a worse idea for Jess's romantic weekend than to invite Nick and his wild girlfriend.  It really shows that Jess was desperate not to be alone with Sam in an intimate setting and also how much she needs Nick at her side.  I mean, of course, it would be odd for her to invite any of her other single friends, but still.  I could see her inviting Nick whether Angie was in the picture or not.  I expected something would happen to reveal that Jess and Sam aren't as perfect as she's trying to make them to be (even though, as Sam pointed out, they started off as sex buddies with fake names), but I never thought Angie would think the purpose of them being there was to switch partners.

I'm not too mad at Angie for trying to get with Sam for a second.  I mean, calling in Nick and Angie there was weird to begin with and left things up to interpretation.  Plus, Sam was resisting her even while being drunk out of his mind.  What did make me like Angie a lot less was after having a heart-to-heart with Nick about meeting him halfway and admitting that he cared about her, Angie ran off in the middle of the night.  Really?  Nick didn't even get mad about her trying to jump another man's bones and asked for her not to change for him.  I feel like why should Nick even continue to be decent to women when he gets treated like this?  It's a damn shame.  But maybe Nick shouldn't try to date women with so much baggage.  Nick's not so together himself that he can expect to fix anyone else.

I only found a few funny things in that story, all of them about Nick.  The first was when he was drunk and for some reason complimenting Sam:

If you were a hat, you’d be a top hat.  But like a really big Monopoly one.  And I say that
of the deepest compliments.

I like when Nick has these moments where he's just randomly blurting out whatever comes to his mind.  Usually, though, he's not even drunk.

The second line I liked was at the very end after Nick had eaten some potato salad from the trash along with the remaining absinthe:

 I am gonna poop weird tonight!

That was about the funniest thing in the Jess and Nick story, but the Winston and Schmidt's story supplied the rest of the comedy.  It started off well when Schmidt decided that he was going to be the black friend to Winston that he thought Winston was missing.  I was already laughing when he consulted Nick and Cece about it because Nick's face in response to what Schmidt was saying was hilarious.  It was just screaming that it was a bad idea, but of course, once Schmidt has it in his head, it's going to become reality.

Everything that happened between them pretty much had me laughing from Winston telling Schmidt to take the Rastafarian hat off his head to Winston's ridiculous story about how his family used to enjoy crack next to flaming trash can.  You gotta love that Schmidt didn't think for a second that story was full of crap and instead was sort of moved by it so much that he wanted to find him some crack.

The near end of it was when I was really rolling.  It was funny enough to hear Schmidt use the expression "crack cocaine" so many times, but Schmidt his whole attitude toward the whole transaction was hilarious:

[Schmidt] I suppose we could just get out and ask any of these street youths.

[Winston] I’ll let you get out the car first.  Go ahead, do your thing, man.
[Schmidt] I don’t want to ask the wrong person and end up with I want the fresh crack, you know? Not some crack that’s been laying around all day.

I didn't think that it could get funnier than that until they brought a random stranger in their car.  It was really funny that Robert ended up thinking that Winston and Schmidt were gonna rob him.  I loved hearing them scream like they were being murdered.  It really makes me thankful for Winston who is the kind of guy who would let things get this far before coming clean.  One of the best Schmidt and Winston moments yet.

It's a bit sadder than I imagined that Nick and Angie are over (maybe), but I'm not entirely unhappy about that.  Seeing Nick and Jess in the cabin, it's just clearer and clearer that they would be so magical together.  Certainly more than Jess and Sam, who aren't exactly firing off fireworks in the romance department.  Schmidt is definitely a moron for thinking he had to cater to Winston's "black" side, but at the same time he's proven that he's willing to go beyond and above for a friend even under a very misguided notion.  He might get a little racist and offensive, but you can't question that he loves Winston.  And I love Winston too.  Anyone who can set up a friend to drive to a shady area for some crack as a horrible joke, is a guy I want to see as much of as possible.